For men, maternity seems to be so easy and simple - They have a moment of pleasure, their female partner gets pregnant. Her belly starts to grow, they find out the baby gender, buy furniture and clothes and finally she goes to the hospital and comes back home with the baby.
But, giving birth is not that simple and easy.
All starts as the belly grows, it gets heavier, as well the breasts; movements got limited; nausea; difficulty to find a position to sleep. During pregnancy they may develop diabetes, anemia, infections, high blood pressure and many others.
The most impressive part happens inside the hospital room
Women have a very small aperture comparing to the size of the baby. The worst is not the passage of the head of the baby, but the shoulders, the hips that go together through that dilated and generally cutten or naturally ripen aperture.
The woman's pelvis bones are pushed apart as the baby is making the exit.
So, normally, women are anaesthetized to better handle that agonizing labor pain. Labor can take hours...
Women chose to receive or not this anesthesia, called epidural - that is an injection done in the spine. This procedure has the risk of nerve damage. But, seems to be rare.
After receiving this drug for pain relief, women are total or partial numb from the abdomen down, so they can't push so hard. Therefore, their vagina has to be cutten (perineum area). Or it can be rippen by the baby when passing. After, labor, it is stitched. It will take a month and half to properly heal.
While, pushing - what is strongly and constantly suggested by the nurse and doctor - women may defecate and urine in the bed. It is less usual as women are advised to make an enema.
However, there will be always mucus being expelled from the vagina.
Despite the mucus, the blood and other fluids, the placenta also needs to be pushed out the uterus, after delivery.
The appearing of hemorrhoids is common. As the womb grows, its weight makes pressure in the intestine, forcing it to move. It normally, originates constipation. The increase of the blood flow also dilates the vases. But, the pushing during labor can make it worst.
Another thing that frequent happens during pregnancy and giving birth is the stretching and weakening of the muscles that keep the bladder closed (pelvic floor). And, when this happens these muscles can't stop the bladder from leaking urine, while coughing, sneezing, lifting or exercising.
After, delivery and returning home, the woman is exhausted and needs to rest, but there is a baby crying that needs attention, care, to be feed, bathed, etc.
The uterus will take approximately a month to return to its normal size.
Why giving birth is so painful? Women are pressured and rushed in the hospitals and private clinics to give birth fast. Giving birth has it´s natural timing.
I believe that´s why is so painful to give birth.
The men just hear names like contractions, dilatation,water break. But, what mean these names? Do they really know? Don't think so.
This male ignorance is, also, because women want them to be that way. Women don't want them to be involved in the hard part of this experience. So, men keep thinking that maternity is pinky and easy!
For them, it sure is! They just need to ejaculate and wait.
Why women hide this from men, their husbands, their partners, the love of their lives, the father of their baby?
Why women don't want or need their support in that moments?
Maybe many women don't really know what is coming for them...